By Kenny Gray
Ah, boredom. An inevitability for even the busiest of individuals. Try as we may to fill our days with work, there comes a point where the looming abyss of free time finds its way into our mind. Sure, I sent emails to others asking for work, networked at the 4PM tap, and even schemed up stunts to get myself assignments. But the truth is, there are just slow days. I won't let that impede me from being creative though. Instead of wasting my time with vapid vices like Facebook, I used my down time over the past two weeks to make stuff.
Care to see what I created? Well then, scroll on down!
Conspiracy Theories from the First Day
I’m not convinced there is more than one floor in this office. They all look the same. I would not be surprised if when I stepped into the elevator it only pretended to move, and I just knew so little about the floor plan that I only thought I was on a new floor.
How do the the turnstiles in the lobby assign which elevator I’m supposed to use? I assume it’s just an algorithm that sends me to the one closest to the ground but… it feels personal.
Where are the other interns? Do they even exist? There are supposedly 30+ more floating around we did not meet on the first day. My theory is that this is an M. Night Shyamalan “The Village” scenario where they (spoiler alert) tell us tales of fake creatures.
There are Dunkin Donut boards around the office that they told us are “mock ups to see what they might look like when they’re actually in stores”. However, I think it is more likely that they are secretly operating a Dunkin Donuts downstairs, but it’s only for non-interns.
Canned Lion, by Kenny Gray, 2017. Sharpie on Post-it note.
What we see here is wildly dumb word play based off Kenny Gray's mishearing of someone saying "Cannes Lions". The resulting work has been hailed as overwhelmingly underwhelming and seems to be a clash of both Andy Warhol and a child learning to draw. "Canned Lion" is an instant classic amongst instant trash but will forever endure in the heart of most likely just Kenny.
- What did Karen Kaplan say to the board after winning lots of new business? It's all up Hill Holliday from here!
- The people of Hill Holliday are so nice. Some would say too nice. There must be bodies in the basement... bodies of WORK!
- Create a creative brief asking for a joke about "boxers or briefs?" where the punchline plays with the concept of referring to briefs not as underwear but instead as creative briefs for an ad agency. (Note: this joke is deeply meta, as it is a brief asking for a joke about a brief, which seemingly creates a loop in which the brief itself is the punchline that the document is asking for. Include all this text on the brief for maximum effect.)
An Excerpt from "Henry the Free Seltzer: A Soda Stream of Consciousness Children's Story"
“Is that what I think it is?” Henry said aloud, free of vocal fry.
It was what he thought it was! A delightful finch wearing a top hat doing sick breakdancing moves on the world's tiniest piece of cardboard. That bird was breaking it down old school style, occasionally taking breaks to sip on fresh Panera tomato bisque.
“Do you believe in magic?” he sing-shouted at the bird.
Not even five minutes later, Henry and the bird were Seattle bound in a wood paneled Corvette. They couldn’t speak the same language, but it was obvious they both had found their partner in life... and also in business. The two would go on to open a mildly successful boutique PR firm that serviced modern ice cream companies and traveling circuses who needed help with rogue clown’s twitter accounts.
So, there it is. A digital gallery of what can be accomplished in creative spurts with small chunks of free time. The greatest twist of all? By using this content in a blog post I have retroactively turned my idle time into time working on content for a blog post.